Thursday, June 18, 2009
Crying off and on again
Janey went a while without the awful crying spells, but they are back a bit this week---just endless crying for no reason we can figure. She is waking up in the night again too. The first month with the ABA seemed really like a breakthrough---she was talking more and more social and happy, but the last week I hope is just a little break in the progress. She is repeating lines from videos more. I wish I could get a handle on her talking, understanding it. It's very odd. She says very little original when talking to people, but there are times when she is playing on her own or reading a book to herself that she talks tremendously well, with stream of consciousness long sentence and lots of expression. So there is a way she can do it, but just not socially or on demand. It is painful to watch her when she really wants to tell me something that can't be said with a set phrase. Often she will just resort to "hold my hand" and will take me where she wants to go. Today she said "I want to go to the ice cream store and get an ice cream cone". She meant Ron's, down the street, and we never get a cone, always a dish, but it was a good original question (I didn't have any cash so we didn't go, usually I do try to do what she asks if it's possible at all). I guess it bothers me as she gets bigger how it's so obvious she has some sort of disability. When she was littler it was acceptable not to answer people and to act a bit differently, but now it isn't. At the school, although I've certainly never told all the parents her diagnosis, they all seem to know she's autistic. That shouldn't bother me, but it does.